Things seem harder to do these days. I am not sure why.
Is it the changing seasons? Am I fighting a bug? Or have I just gone pure lazy? I am not sure what is going on. But here is a list of things that are suffering in my life:
Reading
I can’t just seem to make time to pick up a physical book these days. Audiobooks are still happening, mostly in the gym as I am working out. But the whole day seems to disappear, with no pages read, and no dent in my reading plans. I don’t like this at all. And I think I will just have to monitor my time better to fit it back in. Is it more screen time, or me just taking on too many things, or just spreading the already happening things too long in my day…I don’t know. But I do know that I am not enjoying being bookless. I do read a page or two from the book at my bedside once I am in bed for the night. But that is nearly not enough. And I have a whole list of books waiting for me to get to them. So I better get cracking, right?
Drawing
My drawing practice seems like one of those on again, off again obsessions in my life. There are times when I am super religious about it, and am loving my journey. But then, I take a break for whatever reason- summer, vacation, holidays, busy season etc. And then getting back in seems HARD! And that hardness comes from two places. First, I have to make time for it in my day all over again. I usually draw after dinner, after cleanup as I’m getting comfortable for the evening when everything has been taken care of. Sometimes I need to draw for my studio time art practice. Those days I call it done, and may end up doing an evening drawing if I am feeling excited, but not usually. But these days I just feel tired once I’m done with my days chores and tasks. And getting motivated never happened from a place of being tired. So there. The second place that the hardness for drawing seems to come from for me is not having a clue of what to draw! I find it hard to find an interesting subject every single day. And again, a tired mind at the end of the day is not interesting in thinking up of things to draw. So I think, I need to pick a subject earlier in the day, and maybe even place it near where I draw so I can get reminded and motivated, and get going…
Sitting in silence or Meditating
I like to sit silently for 10-15 minutes sometime between finishing up work and having dinner. That keeps my mind sane and balanced. And it’s one way of switching off thoughts related to my art practice or business side of things, and getting ready to be present with my family, switch off the chatter of the world and getting ready for resting soon enough. My husband does the same thing with going for long walks after work, and being back home in time for dinner. Because I am taking care of stuff in the kitchen, I just find my 10-15 minutes in between tasks and get my quiet time in. But that too has been out of reach for these past two weeks. And that’s bugging me. I obviously need it, but am really not sure where the time is disappearing. Something else I have to figure out how to fit back in my day. And that starts with monitoring how I am spending my day.
Maybe time logging is in order for the next week to figure out how I am using my time, and where I can be more efficient with it. Because, right now my days are not serving me in the way I like best. And I would like to change that.
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