I started reading Mel Robbins’ book The Let Them Theory over the weekend. This book is making waves right now. And I was actually surprised to have received it on my library holds so soon. I was thinking I’ll be waiting a couple more months or so. 

I got a few more books in the same hold. But I am reading Mel Robbins’ book first and quickly. For a couple of reasons.

One, it’s an easy ready, so it’s a good time to make it up in speed to get through more books this month.

And two, I know other people are waiting in the library queue for it, so I might as well read it quickly and get it back in circulation.

Mel Robbins’ Let Them theory is simple:

Let people do what they do- how they react, or judge, or what they say, or do or think in conjunction to any situation involving you. Since we cannot control every situation, people’s thoughts or beliefs or actions, we should absolutely quit trying and “Let Them” be as they are. Instead, “Let Me” part of the equation tells us that the only thing we can control is us and how we think, do or say. So “Let Me” show up in the kind, graceful, strong, quirky way that I want to in this world, or in that situation. Let me go about my business as I mean to, without concerning and worrying myself about other people’s opinions.

In the book, Mel Robbins goes on to apply this theory to many different situation and relationships- friendships, family, colleagues- through examples and through research information available today. She name drops many of her guests from her podcasts who are experts in their fields, and uses their research information to illustrate her point.

I like the theory very much, it makes total sense to me. But it is nothing new for me. Coming from a Hindu upbringing and society in India, I have heard this advice all my life as teachings from the Bhagavad Gita: Do your job to the best of your abilities (KARMA), and leave the rest aside- its not your job to worry about it. But it was good to hear this same teaching of my ancestors in a new set of words, and with lots of examples. 

Sometimes, when learning a piece of advice is that important, it helps to hear it in many different ways. Because some ways of putting this information hit people harder than in other ways. Whichever way sticks, right? The point is to internalize this very essential learning of human life. And having heard it not only in many different ways, but repeated time and time again is what helps me to really take it in, soak in it, and make it a part of my being.

I am happy for this reminder to mind my own business well, and let others be who they are once again through reading this book. I am enjoying this quick read, and Mel Robbins’ way of writing- it is just how she talks in her podcasts- simple and conversational, and definitely not high brow or academic. 

My favourite story (so far) is the one of her son’s prom where she first used the “Let Them Theory” based on her daughter’s advice, and the idea took seed in her. I hope to be able to apply this principal more intentionally to my own life and to the simplest of situations as this book has opened my eyes to. That way I can leave my brain and my emotions freer to do bigger and better things in life. Right?